Days of Nicki

Engaged!

2011-11-05T22:15:00.005-06:00

My birthday is Oct 17 and now is the anniversary of my engagement to my best friend! Chris took me to dinner at the Roof; we had decided on the Garden the day before, but apparently he had reservations there since September and I just fell into his little plan when I suggested the Garden. We had a table in the very back corner right in front of the Salt Lake Temple. It was gorgeous. He gave me the perfume Aquadigio which I loved and thought it was my birthday present. I was pleased with it, but he had more up his sleeve.

The Roof is a buffet style formal restaurant and he kept making me go up and eat over and over. After the 4th time I gave in and said no more. He asked the waiter to bring out the check and the waiter also brought out a ring box. Needless to say I was very surprised and sat up in my chair quickly. After staring at him and the box back and forth for about 30 seconds, I started to reach for it. He stopped me and took me hand, looked me in the eye, told me he loved me, that I was his best friend, and other phrases. He then asked me to marry him. I said yes of course and was so excited. He kinda teared up a little bit and I really tried, but I was too excited. We are planning on getting married May 5, 2012 in the Saint George Temple. I am so excited and CANNOT wait to be with my best friend forever!! Is it May yet? :)

My gorgeous ring!

(He custom designed the

whole thing. I had no part

in picking it out. How good is he!)

Jetta! Jetta! Jetta!

2011-08-18T17:40:00.002-06:00

This is my new car! It's a 2011 VW Jetta. Great upgrade from my last car. I kind of took a little rendevous on day and drove quite a ways in my Nissan and came to the realization, once again, that my car would not go over 3,000 RPM's nor accelerate after driving for a period of time. So I talked to Chris about it and we decided to go look at VW's after dinner one night. We found this car and came back the next day to test drive. I told them what my price range was and they came back with $85/month more than what I had stated. Obviously I told them no. They came back with another number and I said no again. And again. And again. And again. And because they were crunched for numbers, I got the price I wanted. Look what I learned from my dad. I love to drive it; it's quiet and smooth, and Chris loves to drive it. I swear he drives it more than I do. My mom just laughs because it's my 3rd new car in 5 years. Hopefully this one will treat me better than my first two. The great thing is is that it's maintenance free!

Boise, Portland, Seattle

2011-08-18T17:26:00.005-06:00

(on top of the Space Needle)

Last week, on our way home from Saint George, Chris and I talkedabout taking a quick trip...once again. We've wanted to take one all summer, but then I got sick, he had work and school, and our schedules just didn't match. He finally quit his job and we decided we wanted to take a quick trip up to Portland and Seattle since neither of us had ever been to that section of the country. We, I should say he, decided we should camp to save money on hotels and we camped outside of Seattle for 2 days. I can't exactly say I enjoy camping. It's cold, no light, outside bathrooms, allergies up the wazoo, no mirrors, etc. But there were showers! All in all it was good trip.

(brunch...so good!)

We saw the Space Needle and ate brunch on top of the needle. It wentaround three times while we ate so we could seethe entire city. A littlepricey but totally worth it. We also saw the Seattle temple which was under construction as well as theBoise temple. 12 hours of driving back and 14 miles there. Worth the trip tho. I got to spend 4 days with my best friend. I learned some things that drove me crazy about him but nothing I couldn't live with. :)

(waterfront homes...like in Sleepless in Seattle)

6 Months

2011-08-18T17:12:00.003-06:00

Believe it or not Chris and I have been dating for 6, now 6 1/2 months and it has been total bliss! (in my eyes). We've spent time with each other's families, took a trip, double dated, and spent lots of time together but enough time apart that we don't get sick of each other. I'm crazy in love with him and know that he is the best thing for me. After 5 years of knowing each other I can finally say he's mine :) This is our first photo together at Lily's baby blessing...took us 6 months to take one. LOL

Home Sweet Home

2011-08-18T17:03:00.002-06:00

I have forgotten to mention that I moved...once again. Within the past 9 years I have been graduated from high school, I have moved 9 times if you count living in Virginia on my mission. I was getting tired of driving 30 minutes to work and back each day, and then having to drive up more to see Chris is SLC during the week as well as the weekends. It was getting expensive in gas and time consuming. Drama was also beginning to occur in the apartment so I decided to find anther place to live. I settled on a townhouse in Draper right off of Bangerter Hwy. Now it only takes me 15 minutes to get to work and to Chris' place. Talk about convenience. I feel that it's a much better living situation with 3 other girls. We all have our own schedules and do our own thing but we get along well. Love it!

Welcome to the World!

2011-06-18T16:41:00.009-06:00

Yesterday at 7:19 PM, I became an aunt! Baby Lily Ann was born June 17, 2011 at Dixie Regional Medical Center in Saint George, Utah, weighing in at 7 lbs 6 oz 19 1/2 inches long with a full head of dark curly hair to Ryan and Alicia. She was a week overdue and induced yesterday but all is well and she is here and healthy! She is a beautiful baby and I'm not saying that because I'm partial to her. She honestly doesn't look like a newborn. I'm tons excited to be an aunt and can't wait to spoil this little princess rotten. Isn't she beautiful!!!!

Delivery of...gall bladder

2011-06-17T11:27:00.004-06:00

26 years old. Healthy. Female. Thin. Don't exactly fit the clinical diagnosis for one who needs her gall bladder taken out, but yet again, I'm once under the knife. I went into the ER on the 27th of May with severe pain off and on and dull pain that wouldn't go away. They decided to do an ultrasound and found some other problems in my abdomen and ended up doing a CAT scan as well. ER bill: over $7,000. Glad I only had to pay around 175. THIS is why I have insurance. Saw a surgeon two days later and he recommended getting it out. So on June 15, I delivered a yucky gall bladder that needed to come out. $7,200 dollar surgery. I was quite loopy when I came out saying all sorts of sassy things and apparently had a very funny conversation with my boyfriend who called because I kept asking if he had called. I'm all hyped up on Loritab and sitting at home having to rely on my mom for help. It's really hard for me because I'm so independent and want to do everything on my own. And on top of all this, Alicia is being induced today. We can never have just one thing going on in our family. I also have to go see another specialist to possibly do a laproscopy of my abdomen to figure out the other problems that are going on. Once again, over a $7,000 surgery. I love medical bills....but I'm resting and doing well!

Fight!

2011-03-05T17:03:00.002-07:00

Fighting? What are your thoughts on it? Fun? Invigorating? Stress release? Competition? Me? I'm not exactly a fan of fighting or any kind of confrontation. I get all nervous and my adrenaline shoots up. My brain is yelling at me as my body heat rises and I start to shake all over. Yet...I did something completely out of the ordinary yesterday. As my boyfriend and I were waiting for our movie to start...okay, we had an hour and a half to kill at Jordan Commons...he suggested fake fighting so we would know how to fight when we really have an issue. I wasn't too keen on the idea, considering there are only two times in my life when I want to be the center of attention: my wedding day and when I have a baby. Either way, we fake fought in public, in Jordan Commons...3 times. It was the best entertainment I could have asked for last night. On two different occasions, I stood up and demanded his keys and as I walked off, yelled, "You can walk home!" The best part was people were trying not to watch but couldn't help looking. We did it all improv and didn't play any of it. At one point, as I walked off, two guys turned around and said, "Dude. What did you do?" Classic. So if you would like cheap entertainment for yourself and your significant other, I suggest...fake fighting in public.

Grad School

2010-11-19T20:25:00.009-07:00

So as I sit here on a Friday night, doing absolutely nothing, I decided it was probably time to update the blog. So here goes. Nothing much as really warranted a blog post, but I did decide what to get my masters in. Yay! I decided to just do a traditional Masters of Education from SUU. I loved their education program and decided they were the best route for me. Granted it was more because they didn't require the GRE because I had a high enough GPA, but we're not telling them that. :)

I will most likely begin in June. I missed the deadline for winter semester. I will do classes mainly online and through EdNet and get an endorsement in English as a Second Language at the same time for $15 a credit. I'm pretty stoked. I've been throwing ideas about my masters through my head for the past 11 months and am finally settled on a degree. Right now, just a regular ed. Possibly an administration endorsement later or a doctorate degree but right now, masters degree will be achieved by 28!

Here Comes the Bride...

2010-07-09T19:08:00.006-06:00

On June 26, we had my little brother's wedding in the backyard. My fourth wedding in a month. Wow! Talk about stress on my mom, along with other family issues, but all in all it turned out well. His fiance's name is Alicia, from Chicago, and they met up in Salt Lake in November. It turned out really pretty and quite a few people turned out to show their support. We had both the reception and the ceremony in our backyard. They plan on being sealed in the temple in a year. Kudos to mom to pulling it off and kudos to them!

Ryan and Alicia

Kissing the bride

Poore family

Mom and Ryan

Me!

Mom and the boys

My good lookin' brothers

Lake Powell

2010-07-08T22:24:00.011-06:00

For the first time, I finally got a chance to go to Lake Powell. And it was just what I needed. Relaxation away from life and the chance to meet new people. It was a lot of fun. I drove up from STG, on a Sunday, arrived at 8PM, and stayed through Wednesday morning. We wake boarded, water skied, jet-skied, tubed, lounged around the houseboat, and slept on top of the houseboat under the stars. It was really pretty; although, the sun gets up way too early without any mountains to block it. Wake boarding 8AM

Dancing on the boat...notice the guys behind us :)

Chilling on the boat eating Otter Pops (I ate so many)

I had one of the guys take me out on the jet-ski, and before we were even out of sight of the houseboat, maybe 2 minutes, he dumped me into the lake and himself by flipping it. He ended up partially sinking the jet ski and it wouldn't start. I just layed in the lake laughing hysterically. They had to tow it back to the houseboat with the other jet ski and ended up spending an hour fixing it. I showered while they fixed it :)

I wake boarded again which I was totally stoked about. I hadn't wake boarded since 2008 and was afraid I wouldn't be able to get back up again. I didn't have the chance to get to the lake last year so it had been about two years since I had been; but, I got right up and did quite well the first day. The second day I didn't do so well because I was so sore. I woke up that morning and I swear every muscle in my body ached. But luckily we had enough guys willing to give us massages. :) I spent the entire time with no make-up on, one shower in 3 days, my hair piled on top of my head, and my days spent in a swim suit. Loved it! I hope to be able to do it again next summer!

2nd day wake boarding

My crash....

Mexican Riveria Cruise

2010-07-08T21:26:00.024-06:00

Two days after school let out we left to the country. Yes, finally. I left the mainland as I call it. The family took a week long cruise to three cities in Mexico. I thoroughly enjoyed most of it minus the rocking of the ship. My stomach didn't handle it too well. We hit Cabo San Lucas, which I think was the most beautiful place, Mazatlan, the most irritating because of all the vendors, and Puerto Vallarta, where we hit the jungles of Mexico.

Staircase in our dining room

Arriving in Cabo

Just sailing along

In Cabo San Lucas, we walked the streets looking around and then took a glass bottom boat out to a 'lover's beach" and snorkeled. All of us minus Mom came out with battle wounds from snorkeling. After I got thrown into the rocks while snorkeling, I didn't really go back out. I also had a difficult time relaxing with my head under water trying to breathe at the same time. But it was a gorgeous place.

At Lover's Beach

My battle wounds which turned into a nasty scar

Pulling into Cabo

In Mazatlan, we did most of our shopping. There were vendors all over the place, and no matter where we went, we were bombarded to buy something. I felt really bad because I knew this was some of the people's only income, so as my brother's put it, "I got hosed."

This boy was walking around the beach looking for people to pay to take pictures with his iguana. As he walked away another vendor said, in broken English, "quick, take picture now." This got the kid's attention and Jeremy snapped it right as he turned around. Notice the disgusted look developing on his face...the other vendor then laughed and said, "he got picture; didn't have to pay." lol

Puerto Vallarta was the most fun place for us. We did an outdoor adventure in the jungles where we rappelled and zip-lined through the jungles, It was so much fun. The guides we had were hilarious and we had a great time with them. Mom was sure she was going to die on this excursion but she made it through!

Funny story about this: I ended up kicking one of our guides in the shoulder as he shook me on a zip line so to get back at me, he dropped me 15 feet into the water. So as he was helping me up, the girl taking the pics told me to pull him in. So I did and here's both of us in the water.

I had trouble on this one; I get slipping and slamming into the rocks...

First Zipline

I have decided I prefer air and land travel due to the lack of liking all of the rocking on the boat. But I highly recommend a cruise once in a lifetime. Our attendants and servers were so nice; and he food was amazing. All you can eat! We had a great time.

Mother's Day

2010-06-02T08:00:00.005-06:00

I did forget to write about this. I had Mom send me some pictures that we had uploaded to create a DVD of Dad for the funeral of pictures throughout his life. I had her send me one of the day I was blessed when I was a baby and one of their hands when they were married showing their wedding rings. I turned both of them into black and white and touched up by a friend and then made 8x10's of them on the computer and gave to her for Mother's Day. The one of their hands really had special meaning for her after an experience she had with his wedding ring in the temple. I'm grateful for my mom and everything she is and has become for us. She's stronger than she realizes and is such a strength to each one of us kids and I don't know what I do without her. She is my strength, my mother, and my best friend.

"School's Out for the Summer"

2010-06-02T07:32:00.003-06:00

All I have to say is hallelujah! It has been a long year and I can't exactly say 2009 was fun. I have enjoyed the majority of my classes and will miss quite a few of my students this year. I have enjoyed having a lot of them and the laughs I get each day. I always say, after I go to work, that I never have a dull day and each day is never the same. Although I teach the same stuff sometimes 5 times a day, each period is different. Sometimes I get to the point where I can repeat the handouts I have, but overall I really do love teaching. My goal one day is to get to the high school level. I student taught at Dixie High and loved it. And probably starting in 2012, I will begin my masters in administration. I am starting in the fall to take some classes working towards my social studies composite endorsement which will allow me to teach geography, history, sociology, psychology, government, and economics. 21 credits and then I can attempt to pass the Praxis test :)

I do have some fun things planned this summer. I'm going on a cruise Sunday to Mexico with the fam which I am so stoked about. (I'll make sure to post pics) Ryan is getting married at the end of June so I'll be spending some time in STG. Texas is in the middle of July; my cousins live there so I'm going for a week, and then right when I get back, on to Idaho to visit Grandma and Grandpa Lords. So needless to say, I'll be traveling the West this summer and I'm excited!

Single Mess

2010-05-21T08:40:00.006-06:00

My roommate sent this to me and she had found it on one of her friend's blogs so I wanted to post it because it's totally how I feel! We love you married people and are happy for you, but quit bugging us about marriage! :)

Common Misconceptions About Us Singles
(mostly the Mormon kind)

By Taren and Julianna (Check her out. Cause she's my roommate and she's awesome. And single.) Oh, and the many conversations had with Katelin (Hi Katelin!) concerning the topic of our single mess have been the source of much inspiration... just thought I should throw that out there... um, okay.

1. When we say we're fine -- we're doing great, it's all a clever ruse. In fact, we don't keep knives or other abnormally sharp objects around the house because by the time we get home after a long day we're just so gosh darn lonely and down in the dumps that the temptation to end it all is JUST TOO GREAT!

2. We define ourselves by our relationship status. Quite the contrary. You define us by our relationship status.

3. If we could just become the right person, then we could find the right person. Let's kick that theory in the butt right now, shall we?

4. That anyone with half a brain thinks or acts anything like those DB's over at Mormon Bachelor Pad, or the losers they "date".

5. That we are incapable of progressing past a 17-year old level of spiritually and/or responsibility. Adult supervision is necessary at all times. Even ward activities would take a turn for the worse, and mass pandemonium would ensue if the old marrieds weren't around to mold our feeble young minds. How can a single person possibly be expected to calculate the correct amount of rice krispy treats needed to feed 30 equally troubled youth? In all seriousness, it's like I've been attending an never-ending EFY session... for the past 7 years, and this time there is no guarantee that I will ever be able to get the hell out.

6. That we worry. Without constants reassurance and wise advice from 22 year-old newlyweds we would surely be lost in the valley of the shadow of death, unable to perform our day-to-day activities, always thinking in the back of our minds "WHEN? WHEN?! WORRY!!!" But here's the thing married people of the world: you're still not sure about a lot of things in your life, but you know that everything will work out. That things will work out according to God's timetable. Single people have this same assurance. Genius!

7. We're just so darn sexually frustrated. Grrrrrrr. At any moment we might A@#$@#$!!!!!L;KSJDFAOIEJNFDJ%&%*ADPIUPEWNVPOQWPOI##$##AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

8. I'm approaching 25 and I still enjoy such activities as miniature golf. Bowling. Nicklecade. Laser tag. Classic Skating. Scavenger hunts. Mafia. Disney Scene It? WHEN WILL IT END? I don't know of any married person who enjoys scavenger hunts. Why does my lack of husband make me any different?

9. Both of the single people you know will of course be perfect together, based on their singleness alone. If nothing else, at least they can bond over their love of miniature golfing and their lack of sextivities. As single as your bald and greasy, 36 year-old Dungeon and Dragon's playing co-worker may be, I just don't think he's the right guy for me.

10. That we don't want to get married. If leaders and concerned citizens didn't constantly remind me that I should be married, the thought would leave me and I'd sit alone in my apartment all day, surrounded by empty twinky boxes and Cosmopolitan magazines, glorying in the eternal singlenss of it all and lack of obligations. As much as I do love a good Twinky...

11. That we must be turning down opportunities right and left. That we turn up our nose to every potential suitor. That we don't "try" hard enough. Believe me, I could get married tomorrow if all I wanted was to be married. The bottom line is I don't want to marry just anyone. I want it to happen for me the same way it happened for you. Should I have to "try" to fall in the love with someone because I'm 24 and my biological clock is ticking? The only reason you're married is because you met the person you wanted to marry. It's a simple as that, really. Wouldn't you agree that it might be possible for someone to make it all the way to the rip old age of 27 without that opportunity ever presenting itself? Well? Do you?!

The biggest misconception of them all:

All hope was lost until the Ensign brought me this picture of anxiously engaged young adults from various ethnic backgrounds, who prior to posing for this picture weere, no doubt, singing hymns at the local nursing home.

Nothing brings hope like knowing you are counted among the likes of such exemplary individuals.

The End.

(Clever title? Eh? Anyone?... It's like singleness, only singlemess. Bahahahaha. I kill myself.)

New Puppy!

2010-04-04T15:17:00.000-06:00

My mom is a grandma again...well, with puppies. She says she's destined to be only a grandmother to puppies because all her kids are slacking on the marriage and baby thing. She is a little brown and black chihuahua named Roxie. She is four months old; the family has only had her for a little over a week, and already she is a spoiled little princess. She gets kinda skiddish around new people but feed her some yummy food and she will be your best friend. One of her favorite things to do is burrow under the blankets and take naps. We had a pitbull puppy visiting with one of Ryan's friends this weekend and she DID NOT like her at all. Towards the end of the weekend, they kind of got along; but she would yip and bite at the other puppy. I think mainly she was just scared of her. Every time the pitbull would come running down the stairs, she'd run towards me or mom to save her. I'm already in love with her and am ready to take her home. Though the allergies and asthma haven't fared so well this weekend...

Spring Has Finally Sprung!

2010-04-03T20:10:00.000-06:00

I have been waiting forever for the snow to melt and get warm. I feel like this winter has been so long. I spent the weekend with the fam in STG for conference and my spring break and when I left, it was snowing. It's not as warm as I would like it to be down here right now, but it's tons better than snow. When UVU was on there spring break, I spent some time with my friend Sydney and we went and flew kites! I can't remember the last time I flew kites and it was so much fun. I think the last time I flew kites was sometime when I was in high school. There are a couple of pictures of us flying our kites. I got a princess kite :) It makes me happy. Sometimes, it's just fun to revert back to being a kid. I don't do that very often because I teach kids for my career. Below are some pictures of me and my kite-flying experiences. I actually did get it stuck in the tree once and had a time getting it out. But I got it out without me ripping it! SUCCESS! We spent some time playing on the swings as well. I used to spend a lot of time a park called Vernon Worthen Park when I lived in STG. I would go there during my breaks from work and when I needed to think I would go sit on the swings. I think I need to start doing that again...

me on the swings!
Sydney and me on the swings

my kite stuck in the tree :(

me and buddy the dog

Let the Madness Begin!

2009-12-25T19:53:00.000-07:00

Can my life become any more busy? Yes it can, I've decided. I have less than a month until I start grad school! Woot woot! Yes, you heard correctly. I am starting grad school, a MA in Mental Health Counseling, in the middle of January at the University of Phoenix. Along with attending one night a week for four hours, I will continue to teach full time plus some, (I say that because I average 50+ hours a week) tutoring struggling students part time at a learning center in Riverton, and all the wonderful grading I have to do. I am actually quite excited to begin school again. I've always loved going to school, but hated the massive amounts of work, but by the time I turn 29, I will have my Masters! How many people can say that? On the downside though, let's just say not much time to be social or date. Oh well. :) I am on the downclimb of the school year which means TESTING! I have to prep the kids for numerous standardized tests, so now my stress level will reach an all time high. I'm waiting for things to just get back to normal, but what exactly is normal?

I recently moved back to Orem and currently share an apartment with two fun-loving girls. It is a much better living situation than my last residence and now I actually enjoy coming home; whereas, before, I would dread going to a place I didn't really consider home. As for the social life, I think everyone and their dog is trying to set me up. Not too stoked on the idea because I don't particularly enjoy socializing with people I don't know very well. I tend to be on the shy side at first. But here's the best part: they're trying to set me up with balding, nerdy, younger guys. Heaven help me. I just smile and say, I'll think about it" and then never mention it again.

One of my good friends Chelci and her friend Nykell came up about a week and a half ago and we all went to PF Changs and to temple square in SLC to see the lights. Here are some pictures from our little escapades.

Chelci, Nykell, and me in front of
tree at JSM building.

Yup, I took this picture. :)

At the top of the Joseph Smith Memorial Building

Nykell and I waiting for Clint
and Chelci to meet us.

Candid shot in front of the tree at the JSM building

As the Year Comes to a Close....

2009-12-13T19:43:00.000-07:00

It's hard for me to believe that once again another year has flown by. The last six to seven months have been some of the most difficult of my life. My life has changed dramatically as most of you know but yet it still seems to keep going when sometimes all I want is for the world to stop for just a moment. I express gratitude to all those who have supported me and my family and have spent countless hours praying for the welfare of our family. I feel as though I have become a completely different person because of the trials I have endured this past year. My priorities have shifted and have taken on a whole new level. My mom gave each of us kids plus Lori (Jeremy's girlfriend) a Thankful Book so to speak on Thanksgiving. I have misplaced it, somewhere in my room, but in each of our books, she wrote why she was grateful for us. I decided that I was going to make myself some new goals (I'm way ahead of the New Year's resolution deal :) ) and make some changes in my life; things I feel need perfecting. Some of those goals included making scripture study more personal to my life, writing down two things I was grateful for each day (I misplaced my book though), writing in my journal once a week (still working on that one), and writing down memories of Dad before they begin to fade so my children will know their grandfather, and others. Oh and updating my blog once a month. Sometimes I forget I have these things such as journals and blogs that I need to use more to my benefit. So far I'm up to getting about half of the things done but some need a little more time to get into the perfecting mode.

Each year, for the past four years or so, I have attended The Forgotten Carols. I am in love with the production and it is one of the highlights of my Christmas holiday, alongside my Christmas break from school. :) The first two years, I went with Mom and Dad, and actually met Michael McLean and his wife in the east side of Vegas the year I came home from myin a McDonald's in gas station. Funny, I know. Last year I took Tawny as a Christmas present and she loved it and this year I took Meghan for her birthday present. She told me it was the best birthday present she had gotten this year. Kudos to me. I think I've decided that each year for Christmas I want to continue to go to this and eventually get the DVD, because obviously it will stop being produced and watch it each year with my future family (cross your fingers for that one). It's always a great way to start off the Christmas holiday season!

In Memory of my Father

2009-11-09T09:53:00.000-07:00

I haven't written on my blog nor in my journal since May 19 and considering so much has happened within the last six months, I think it's high time I caught up. I have truly come to realize that the mistakes of others can really have an impact on your life and it truly has mine. The dishonesty and addictions and lying of those that you care most about changes your outlook on life and how much you wish they would change their lives to more righteous living to spare them the pain and especially those on the outside. I have been dealing with these things in my life from others for the past six months. I never knew it was possible to feel so much pain within just a few months. Although the choices of these people has caused me pain, it has not caused me as much pain as the passing of my father. My dad passed away on Oct. 29, 2009 of respiratory failure, diverticulosis, and peritonitis, all of the abdominal area in at DRMC in the ICU. I never knew it was possible to feel such physical and emotional and mental pain all at once. I've had so many emotions flooding through me the past 10 days that I wouldn't know where to begin explaining about it. I feel that if I knew why he had to be taken from us then I would be able to move on so much more easily. Though I know within my heart that our family is an eternal family and that I will see him again, my testimony has been shaken. Thoughts of doubt and what could be more important than his family and why, why why have flooded my mind. I am grateful to have had him in my life and to know him and know that we can be an eternal family. But looking ahead, life seems so long and hard. Always in my mind I had the picture of dancing with him at my wedding, him being apart of the blessing my future children, and a long happy life. It has been quoted many a time from 1 Corinthians 13 where the Lord will never give us more than he can bear. But after these past six months, I wonder how strong He really thinks I am. I have never really seen myself as a very strong person, and if this is a preface of things to come, I'm not sure if I can handle it. But now, more than ever, my family has truly become the most important thing in my life and I want to be with them forever. I just hope and pray I have enough faith and strong enough foundation to make it through this life.

"An Early Goodbye"

There is nothing and no one to blame

And there's no use in thinking what might have been

I would have kept you through life's short span

But God had a different plan

So I'll pray for the day when the sorrow will cease

Pray for the day when I'll know perfect peace

I'll find the courage to make it somehow

But I'm feeling so lonely now

So I'll cry a little bit and I'll try a little bit

And I'll trust in God above to make some sense of it

And my eye will be single to one bright star

To live my life worthy, to be where you are.

But today it's not easy. Today I may cry

So if you see a tear in my eye

It's the pain of an early goodbye

-Janice Kapp Perry-

The Gospel of Jesus Christ

2009-05-19T21:34:00.000-06:00

I've always been grateful for my testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ and for the blessing I've had of being raised by parents who were sealed in the temple and taught me right from wrong in all kinds of situations. I served a mission in Virginia three years ago and was forced to come home early due to illness. I learned a lot about patience and how the Atonement works for those that are hurting due to physical ailments and not spiritual ailments. I gained a testimony of the Atonement in that respect, but yet I don't think I've ever really gained a true testimony of the Atonement in the aspect of repentance. But due to recent events in my life, I have truly come to know that no matter what we do or who we hurt, we are loved by a loving Heavenly Father. He truly knows each of us and all the pain that we go through; whether it be brought upon us by the choices of others or by the small or large infractions we make day by day. I believe one of Heavenly Father's missions in my life is to teach me patience. Each time I'm faced with a new trial in my life, it always has something to do with patience. I seriously do not know how much more patience I can learn!! But I do know that through the Atonement of Jesus Christ and by submitting myself to his will that I can and will become all that I am meant to be. Each day I must learn that I must make my will aligned with His so that I can become what I am meant to be. This has been and will continue to be one of the most difficult things for me to learn because I'm a leader and continually want to do things my way. But, I know that if I continue to trust in my Heavenly Father and confide in Him my greatest desires and fears, that if I keep my covenants and am obedient to His commandments, I will gain the greatest gift of all. I pray I may keep this perspective always.

Princess Party

2009-03-25T22:25:00.000-06:00

For our Relief Society birthday party, our enrichment committee decided we would have a princess party where we would focus on the idea that we are princesses of our Heavenly Father. We all dressed up in our beautiful evening wear and had desert crepes. The girls did a skit about how our Father sent us down to earth to turn us from frogs into princesses of noble birth. One of the girls, as part of the skit, sang "Daughter of a King" accapella and it was beautiful. I had a lot of fun dressing up and making myself look pretty. I haven't worn a prom type dress for years and actually had to borrow one because I figured I wouldn't be wearing one ever again or have any reason to wear one. I hope the next beautiful dress I get to wear is all white where I get walk to the temple with my prince!

"We were born into this world as princesses and in the proccess of growing up, we turned into frogs. The goal of life is not to be a better frog in a bigger pond, but to regain your true identity as a princess of a noble birth, a child of God."

The Joys of Bonfires

2009-03-19T18:09:00.000-06:00

Tuesday night I went to a bonfire to celebrate the official beginning of spring break; yet, I'm not on spring break. Go figure. We went a little crazy with the camera but it was all in fun. We all met in one of the downstairs apartments and left around 8:30. We were supposed to meet at 8:00, but you know MST (Mormon Standard Time) :) We drove up the Provo Canyon and went to Vienna Park. Poor Sydney had to drive the big, huge truck and didn't have lights on the inside so she couldn't figure out how fast she was going unless we shined our cell phone lights on the speedometer! Once we got up there, we realized we were the bright ones of the group and had no flashlights and had to walk up to where we were. There was still snow on the ground and it was freezing! Okay, so like around 42 but we were averaging 65 in the valley. We, well the boys, started the fire, boyscout way, and we all huddled around trying to get warm. We had all the necessities for a bonfire: marshmallows, graham crackers, Hershey's chocolate, and starbursts. Yes you read right. Roasted starbursts are so good! I love it and I introduced it to quite a few people.

There were so many people that showed up. It was insane and it was a huge fire and began to burn my legs under my jeans. I hate that. A few of us had made foil dinners and so we cooked those on the coals. It took three tries to get mine cooked because I had hamburger meat in it and it took forever. Third times the charm! Overall, it was a fun night. I came home smelling like smoke and fire, but hey, isn't that what bonfires are all about?

Gotta Love the Roommates

2009-03-16T21:34:00.000-06:00

So, I have some of the most fun roommates. It's taken us awhile to get to know each other and become friends because our personalities are very different, but it's been so worth it in the process. Last week, Heather decided that she wanted to go hot tubbing but neglected to
tell me it was with a bunch of guys. I had just gotten out of the shower and was just like, "What the heck? Sure, I'll go." Needless to say, I had no make-up, my hair was still wet, so I just threw it in a bunish type thing on the top of my head. Right, I looked so good as you can tell in my pic. Well, we went down and our hot tub has been having issues lately with being warm and it was seriously colder than bath water. I just stayed wrapped in my towel stuck my feet in. After about 20 minutes, I gave in and went back up and studied for my Praxis.

Apparently, the rest of them stayed up til 3 in the morning and watched a movie; well, kinda. They fell asleep because it was some kind of dumb boy movie that they didn't like.

We also love to take crazy pics. Heather and Dani are famous for their crazy faces. The two of them barged into my room when I was in my gigantic sweatshirt and pajama pants and started taking pictures. Also once again with no make-up on again. (Really, I do get ready in the morning :)) Anyway, so here are some fun, crazy pictures of us on here. Hope you enjoy them and I love my roommates!!!

A New Love

2009-03-14T20:27:00.000-06:00

As you read the title, don't get all excited; I'm not in love or getting married. Why on earth would I do that?! LOL. (one of these days) Anyway, I don't think anyone really knows this about me, but one of my new favorites loves is scenery. I honestly hate hiking and climbing rocks and whatnot to see different types of scenery, but I love to take pictures of it. Every time I change the background on my computer, I always look for beautiful scenic pictures of the ocean, sunsets, and even baby animals. So on my way home from Park City today, while driving I might add, I kinda just took my camera and took pics out my passenger side window. Don't worry I didn't look while I took it. It was kinda just trial and error. Some turned out okay; overall, they were bad. But I've also just added a picture that I just think is really pretty on here for all the share and drool over! :)

It's Been a While

2009-03-14T20:15:00.000-06:00

So it's been quite a while since I have been decided there's been anything worthwhile to blog. About a month actually. My friend Tawny brought it to my attention today that it was time to blog something new; so I decided I'll just make this a random one. All last week during school we had spirit week. The kids dressed up as super heros one day and one and my crazy students wore a super hero contest of one of the ninja turtles. When he walked into class with his turtle shell and eye band, I just about busted a gut. (Posted is a pic). He ended up taking the shell off because it was too hot! He reminds me so much of my little brother, Ryan, when he was that age. Small, braces, short, full of life, and funny. He can always make me laugh and when I try and get mad at him for talking too much, sometimes I can't stay serious. That class is total fun. On Friday, we had an assembly where all of the classes, 7th, 8th, 9th, and teachers competed against each other. We had a pie eating contest, over-under basketball, dress-up relay, and a water balloon toss. I did the water balloon toss and got about 3/4 of the way across the gym before I threw it too low. My bad. But, of course, the teachers won. It was great fun against the kids and fun for them to see me in a different light instead as my authoritative teacher.

Best Friends 4-Ever

2009-02-07T23:20:00.000-07:00

I've been introduced to digital scrapbooking by my dear friend Tawny. I'm not exactly that creative so I downloaded this little program and now, voila! I'm a master scrapbooker. This is just one of the designs I created. Whenever I'm with Tawny Diet Coke is involved. I have become addicted to it and the last thing I need is diet stuff. But oh well, I love it. If you'd like to download SmileBox you can click on the link or just google. It's free to download with way cute pages and lots more!

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Girlz Nite Out

2009-02-02T21:17:00.001-07:00

SATURDAY night, my roommates Heather and Dani, and Heather's sister, Brittney, and I decided to have a girls night out. We went to Comedy Sportz in Provo where it is complete improv. Kind of like the TV show "Whose Line." Completely clean humor with some Mormon jokes thrown in there. Gotta love it! We had tons of fun and laughed hard. I totally needed that. During one portion of the show, the actors did a game called Town Meeting where they go and sit in the audience. Heather, out loud, said "There's room on my lap." Quite seductively, I might add. lol. So he sat right in the middle of her and Dani as a Viking woman. It was great fun. Afterward we went to Spoon Me, a new ice cream chain here in Utah. I think it's been around about two years or so. But it's great, yummy ice cream and very non-fattening!! I got that Acai berry ice, a fruit from Brazil and was way good. One of these days I'm going to get one of thier shirts that says, Shut up and Spoon Me !! I can't wait to get it; it makes me happy just thinking about it. One reason I love going to Spoon Me is because I can chew on their spoons. They're biodegradeable. Too bad I'm not a tree hugger!

25 Random Things About Me

2009-02-01T18:21:00.001-07:00

Rules:
Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

(To do this, go to "notes" under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)

1. I am the only girl of 4. I have three brothers I love dearly with two happily married parents. They are my whole world. My mom cried when I was born because she had her little girl; my dad said I was a bald as a billard ball, although I had a full head of hair.

2. I teach two of the most hated subjects: Language Arts and History to middle schoolers. I love my job; although it can be very stressful and time consuming. I was told by my institute teacher I was guaranteed a ticket to the celestial kingdom for teaching middle school.

3. I have trust issues. I have been hurt a lot in my life by girls and guys both; as a result, I have very few close friends that I trust.

4. I also have communication problems. I don't like to talk about my problems and bottle them up inside until I burst...usually let out by crying. I don't like to burden people with my issues...at least that's how I see it.

5. This is my second time serving in the RS presidency in the past two years with the exact same calling: 1st counselor. Apparently I didn't get it right the first time???

6. I have a confession: my greatest desire is to be a wife and a mother. My mom was a stay-at-home mom and want to be the mom that greets her children every day they come home from school. I refer to my students as my "kids" because motherhood seems quite non-existent at this point in my life.

7. I have married off every single one of my roommates except one...15 to be exact.

8. I am attempting to pass my History Content Praxis for teaching for the fifth time in March. I was a history major and there are things on that test I've never even heard of. I hate that test with every fiber of my being.

9. I wrecked my brand new car 5 minutes after I got it.

10. I served a mission in the Virginia Richmond Mission. Two months later I was sent home due to illness. I was unable to return. It was the hardest trial I had ever experienced at that time, but I knew I was to be out there for a reason. I became very close with my Heavenly Father and used the Atonement in a way I never knew existed. I would never want to experience it again, but I am grateful for the experience.

11. The longest relationship I've ever had was 2 1/2 months...I've never said I love you.

12. My all time favorite person is leaving me to serve the Lord in Brazil April 1. I have no idea what I am going to do without her. She's the only who texts me on a consistent basis!! I love her dearly and will miss her terribly.
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13. I hate being alone. I hate being alone with my thoughts. Kind of scary sometimes.

14. If I could travel anywhere in the world, it would be Italy. I desperately want to visit all the history in that country: the Sistine Chapel, the Vatican, Sicily, etc

15. I have been getting allergy shots every month for the past 2 1/2 years. I am allergic to things I've never heard of. Now, I can hold a puppy without sneezing my head off.

16. I got my tonsils out in April and lost 13 pounds in a week. It was a horrible two weeks; I have only gained 15 pounds since my sophomore year in high school.

17. I love the piano. I love playing contemporary music and accompanying people when they sing. My greatest accomplishment was memorizing Clair de Lune and performing it my junior year of college.

18. I can be quite OCD. I hate a dirty kitchen and clean it quite often. My closet is organized by color and in my classroom, I can't stand having my desks crooked.

19. I love my mom dearly. She is my best friend and the one person I tell everything to. She is the greatest example of perseverance and faith that I know. I would not be the person I am today without her. She loves me for who I am despite all my flaws and imperfections.

20. I am a very stubborn person. When someone tells me I can't do something, I will do everything I can to prove them wrong. I always like to be right and will argue something to the bitter end even when I know I'm wrong.

21. I live in Orem right now and commute to West Jordan for my job. It is a 30-minute commute but I enjoy it (except when it snows). It wakes me up in the morning and gives me time to think. I have bought the Book of Mormon CD's and listen to them a couple times a morning on the way up. That can really change my day.

22. I owe everything to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. The gospel is the greatest gift I have been blessed with. It has made me who I am and guides me in who I want to be. I know that He lives and that He loves me despite all the many mistakes I make daily.

23. Family is the most important thing to me on earth. If I could, I'd live with my family for the rest of my life. How grateful I am that I get to live with them for eternity.

24. The TV show I watch faithfully every week is Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice. If I miss it, then I watch in online after school on Friday while doing grades.

25. My dream puppy is a miniature teacup Yorkie. Only about $1,000. I have a picture of one on my desktop to remind me daily of my goal.

2009-02-01T18:13:00.000-07:00

I DECIDED to do create this blog at 5 in the morning last night when I couldn't sleep and had been tossing and turning since about 2:30. It took me forever to get a cute background, but I think I've succeeded. I'd wanted to create a blog for a while but was hesitant because I felt like I didn't have much to talk about because I'm not married and don't have any children. But why's that to stop me?? I figured since I've been really bad a journal writing that I could try and keep up on a blog. Hopefully, I'll be successful at this and if not, someone get on my tail about it!